How Important Is Trust In Marriage?
By America’s #1 Love and Marriage Experts.
Successfully married couples literally trust each other with their lives, their wellbeing, and their sacred honor. The words they use to describe the one they love more often than not include words and expressions like trust, honesty, loyalty, respects me, admires me, always there for me, never lets me down, truthful, and never lies to me. Their trust for each other is about as complete as you can get.
In our interviews with thousands of happily married couples throughout the world, we are always struck by their undying trust in each other. Over the past 30 years, when we asked couples in love to place, in an overall sense, where their relationship is on a 10-point scale with 10 being Absolute Trust, without exception, they say 10! Isn’t that wonderful? As love and marriage experts, we find that remarkable!
Trust is not something all loving relationships start with. For some couples the trust becomes complete in a few years. For others, it takes awhile. But one thing is for sure; happy marriages survive and thrive on the basis of this trust. Trust is so pervasive in their relationship that they never give it a second thought. They expect it. It’s always there. It is part of the fabric of their relationship.
To be truly in love is to be unequivocally and unconditionally dedicated to the one you love. Successfully married couples never cheat on their spouse! To betray your spouse in intimate ways is to destroy your relationship, make no mistake about that. Most marriages cannot recover from this form of betrayal. Don’t fool yourself into thinking it can. As love and marriage experts, we can confirm that once lost, trust cannot be fully regained.
There is one thing you can take to the bank—all people in love have faced temptations in their relationship. Couples who are truly in love in their relationship know that a few moments of sexual satisfaction can NEVER replace the loving, trusting, and caring relationship they have developed with their mate. As someone once said to us, I have a marriage license but I didn’t give up my looking license! Admiring others in intimate ways is normal and healthy. But acting on those urges has ruined many a marriage and many a loving relationship.
Those wonderful couples we have interviewed resist these normal urges and temptations of life because they know their relationship is so much more important to them. Destroying the trust between them would literally cause the very foundation of their relationship to crumble. Destroy that foundation and you destroy your love. When you do so there is rarely redemption—there is rarely ever reconciliation.
Character in a successful marriage or relationship does matter, and character is about trust. Being honest and trustworthy is at the heart of all the best loving relationships we have studied. It really is a 10 on a 10-point scale. In our estimation, character is the foundation of true love!
Creating a successful marriage is not always the easiest thing to do. Your visiting our blog suggests you are highly interested in making your marriage work! And truthfully, we have learned over 30 years of marriage research that there are proven effective ways to ensure a happy and healthy marriage. In fact, we took hundreds of tips from the thousands of happy couples we interviewed and put them into our award-winning and bestselling book, Building a Love that Lasts .
Today, you can see how you stack up to the best marriages around the world. Take the Marriage Quiz to assess your chances of achieving a successful marriage of your own.
you witness the signs, take action. Save your relationship if you can. Having a healthy and happy marriage is one of the great success stories of life. It is not too late to save your marriage.
In love and marriage the simple things matter. Love well!
By Drs. Charles and Elizabeth Schmitz
America’s #1 Love and Marriage Experts